


First Kisses

by Gummiebear



Category: Men's Football RPF
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-08
Updated: 2020-02-08
Packaged: 2021-02-27 22:22:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,716
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22613236
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gummiebear/pseuds/Gummiebear
Summary: Dele and Eric’s relationship through their first kisses.
Relationships: Dele Alli/Eric Dier
Comments: 5
Kudos: 42





	First Kisses

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first chaptered fic EVER so please don’t hold it against me if my updates aren’t fast I’m planning this to be 5 chapters. I have 3 more already planned out. Chapter 5 is a crapshoot at this point. Be nice, be kind, be honest.
> 
> [tumblr](http://softestziam.tumblr.com/)

Eric looked down at Dele pathetically. That was the only way to describe it. His heart was beating against his rib cage rapidly. They had just lost to Iceland, the fantasy of the Euros coming to an end with a crash and burn. All his dreams of the last three weeks were over. The little bubble they had been living in was popped at the final blow of the referees whistle. The French summer sun was hot and adding to the agitation everyone was feeling. Roy came and clapped them all on the back, trying to be as sympathetic as he possibly could be. Eric has tunnel vision, all he could see was the body lying on the floor in a heap of sadness and disappointment. His head was cradled in his hands, fingers digging into his skull as the Icelandic fans were cheering and celebrating, rightfully so. He could faintly hear their fans applauding them despite the result. He just wished they had done better, for them and themselves. He didn’t want to leave, not like this. He wanted to bring a trophy home, they all did. They all wanted to prove their critics wrong, a young squad could get on and work as hard as previous squads had despite all the negativity thrown their way. The players that threw themselves on the floor were slowly picking themselves up, dusting off their clothes and trying to pick their heads up. Eric extended his hand to Dele to help him up, they had to applaud their fans despite the fire burning inside of them. It’s the least they could do. Dele took his hand and hoisted himself up begrudgingly, wiping his face on his shirt sleeve, trying to disguise the tears threatening to fall.

It was all over. Not just playing for England but for them, until preseason at least. They’d part and go on their separate holidays like the last three weeks never existed. Like they weren’t living in each other’s pockets the entire time. Exploring the entire country together. Sneaking out to grab a bite to eat at a hole in the wall cafe at six in the morning or going to a five star restaurant for dinner while the rest of the team stayed behind to bond. They weren’t ignoring them necessarily, they just wanted a little alone time. Kyle always covered for them with Roy and Kane, saying that they were just staying in their rooms or running late to the mandatory meetings. It was out of character for Eric, to be late or sneaky, especially with his manager and captain. Dele on the other hand had a reputation for being mischievous so no one expected anything less from him. If he was with Eric then everyone knew he’d be okay, do his off the field job to perfection. That wasn’t the case. Not this time around. Eric felt carefree, invincible. He was young and untouchable. On top of the world. Playing for his country in a tournament he dreamed about as a kid back in Portugal, just learning the game of football, now all his dreams were going true and he had his best friend by his side the entire time. 

He was snapped back to reality when Dele threw an arm over his shoulder as they walked towards the opposite end of the pitch to their fans. Bless those who stayed to see the boys off, showing their support until the very end. Banners still waving high, hands clapping in appreciation despite the shocking results. No one expected them to win it all but it did feel good to imagine it for a while. Eric grabbed onto Dele’s waist and gave him two reassuring squeezes to his midsection. A gentle reminder to ground himself and that he was by his side, no matter what. It was a silent conversation that they both understood, Dele just looking over at him as he dropped his arm and smiled as they reached their fans. With tears still threatening to fall they showed their appreciation to the crowd. A silent promise to do better in two years for the World Cup. Despite club affiliation, they had brought the country together to cheer for one purpose. It was a somber celebration but one nonetheless. It was now time to pack it all up and head back home or to whatever destination lied ahead for them until a new season began. 

The team coach was silent as they rode back to the hotel. An unnerving buzz in the air. It was palpable and felt sticky on their skin. No one wanted to say anything and no one knew what to say. Eric was sitting in the seat next to the window, Marcus sitting next to him. Dele had walked on behind him and went straight to where Kyle was sitting. Eric wasn’t going to act like he didn't feel hurt but shrugged and walked towards the back, headphones immediately placed in his ears before Roy walked on last. The ride was short and they were supposed to have a debriefing before parting until the plane ride back to England the next morning. No one wanted to gather around and be praised for a sloppy tournament but it was mandatory. Eric looked through the opening between the seat in front of him to see if he could spot Dele who sat three rows ahead of him. No one was speaking so it was hard for him to spot Dele by his laugh, going only on his trainers that stuck out on the aisle. Marcus was scrolling through his phone, not phased by Eric maneuvering his head between the seats. Good kid, kept to himself unless absolutely necessary. Eric sighed and gave up, they’d be at the hotel soon enough and he could check up on Dele. He was fine though, that’s what he kept telling himself. He was with Kyle who knew how to cheer him up as well. 

The entire squad begrudgingly met in the hotel conference room to be debriefed on the entire tournament by the entire coaching staff. Eric sat towards the front near Wayne and Gary, feeling like it was his responsibility to do so. While everyone was shuffling in he spotted Dele sliding into a seat towards the back near Kyle and Danny. They did share a quick smile which calmed Eric down. They were okay, they were both just dealing with the loss different and that was okay. Eric just wanted to talk to him, make sure he was okay. In less than twenty four hours they were going their separate ways for at least a month and Eric didn’t want to leave without words exchanged. He didn’t want to leave things unsaid between them. Roy stood on the stage looking out at his squad, the rest of the coaches by his side. All looked sullen and disappointed but Eric knew that was just Roy’s face ninety nine percent of the time. The old man never seemed to smile. They knew there wasn’t a reason to smile but they’d been through so much in the last two hours, they didn’t need a talking to, they needed encouragement. Wayne and Gary were attentive during the entire speech, still being the dutiful captains they were. Eric hung his head in shame as all their mistakes were laid out in front of them. He played with a loose strand on his shirt, twisting it around his finger just to watch it turn red and go cold. His mind couldn't concentrate on what was in front of him, it kept wandering off to the boy a few rows behind him. What was he thinking? What was he feeling? Was he just as upset to see this time together come to an end the next morning? 

The meeting lasted longer than anyone wanted it to. Half an hour later and Roy had said his peace and dismissed them to whatever within reason until the next morning when they’d all check out as a team and head back to England, heads held high despite what they were feeling inside. Eric felt as if he was the first one up his chair and heading towards anywhere but where he currently was forced to me. He was a man on a mission and his mission was to track down Dele and talk to him. The team went their own separate ways once they filed out the conference room, some retreating to their rooms to pack and make phone calls to their loved ones to arrange plans. Eric kept his eye on Dele who was talking to Kyle by the lifts. Eric stayed far away but close enough to gauge that Kyle was trying to convince Dele to grab something to eat with him and Danny in the hotel restaurant. Dele didn’t speak, just hung his head and shook it. He looked exhausted, both physically and mentally. Eric wanted to help him, look after him. Wrap his arms and a warm blanket around his shoulder, comfort him in his time of need. Kyle left Dele alone by the lifts with a firm pat to his shoulder. It was Eric’s chance to waltzed in. He walked towards the lift just as it arrived, smiling over at Dele who returned the smile. They rode in silence, Dele just staring at the numbers as the ticked by, Eric’s eyes always on Dele, gauging his reactions and movements. 

“What are you doing?” Dele finally spoke as he got off the lift and making a left towards his room, Eric right behind him. “Your room’s the opposite way.”

“You can’t be alone right now,” Eric told him. 

Dele sighed loudly and kept walking towards his room. “I can’t be alone or you can’t be alone, Diet?”

Eric stood behind Dele as he opened the door and let them both in. He kicked off his trainers by the door and dumped his bag on the seat closest to the door. He shrugged his shoulders as Dele turned to look at him after he sat on the edge of the bed. “Both probably.”

“I’m fine,” Dele said as he took off his trainers and placed them next to the foot of the bed. His bag too was discarded as soon as he entered the room. “Bummed but fine. Promise.”

“I’m not okay,” Eric confessed, sitting next to Dele, shocking himself by his own admission. “These past seventeen went by in a blur and now it’s over.”

“We’ll have other tournaments,” he told him, looking up and over at Eric. 

“I’m not talking about football,” he replied sheepishly, his cheeks turning red. “I’m talking about us, Del.”

“We play for the same club,” he reminded him, confused as to what Eric was alluding to. “We see each other all the time. Like, all the time, Eric.”

“Not like this,” he sighed again, running his hands through his hair. “The adventures, the secret breakfasts and dinners. That won’t happen again.”

“It can,” Dele assured him, patting Eric’s knee delicately. 

Eric looked down at his knee as if Dele’s touch had set his skin on fire. His entire body felt like it was set ablaze. He was so preoccupied with Dele’s feelings that he never took his own into consideration. He was so aware of how Dele may have been feeling that his own were being pushed down, suppressed. Dele, his annoying little brother and best friend, was way more than that if Eric was being completely honest with himself. Their little secret hangouts were more than two friends being mischievous, seeking a different kind of adrenaline rush. It meant something, at least it did to Eric. He cared for Dele in a different way than when they first met. Dele’s hand was still resting on his knee, his palm laying flat against his thigh. That’s all Eric could focus on, his head was heavy and fuzzy and Dele’s touch was the only thing keeping him on his feet and grounded. 

“Eric?”

“This month has been the best in my life,” Eric whispered. “Football aside.”

“Eric-“

“I’m scared to see that go,” he told Dele honestly. Eric didn’t know why or how but he felt like he needed to lay it all out for Dele to understand and for himself to understand as well. Maybe if he spoke it out loud he’d understand what he was feeling and why he was so concerned about taking care of Dele after losing a match, something they’ve experienced before. It was much more than a simple match loss. “I’m scared that once we get out of this Euros bubble we’ll go back to just being Eric and Dele and not EricandDele.”

Dele knocked his knee against Eric’s and squeezed it reassuringly. “We’re still us, always will be. You know that?”

“Do I?” He countered. 

Eric felt as if his heart was going to break his ribs and bust out of his chest. The sun was setting outside Dele’s hotel window, the shades still drawn open from this morning. It was their last night in France and Eric felt like it was a new beginning. If he opened his mouth and kept spilling his guts, his feelings, there was no turning back. There wasn’t a redo after this, no pretend he didn’t just open a can of worms, changing the course of their relationship forever. 

“Diet,” Dele called to him softly, shifting his position so his body was facing him fully. “I just don’t take anyone to secluded cafes off the coast of France.”

“You should,” Eric tried to joke, tried to stop the blood from rushing to his face, hearing it in his ears. 

“Eric,” he sighed, placing his free hand shakily on Eric’s face, cupping his cheek. “You don’t have to worry about me so much. I’m okay, we’re okay. More than okay, yeah?”

“Yeah,” he slowly agreed. Eric visibly swallowed, the air in the room thick with tension. The noise from the air conditioning was whirling around them even though Eric was visibly sweating, nervous and anxious. 

“Yeah,” Dele repeated, slowly moving forward, his hand still placed firmly on Eric’s cheek. He felt his heartbeat pick up in anticipation and excitement. Dele just went for it and bridged the small gap between them, connecting their lips. 

Eric was stunned at the sudden change but welcomed it. Dele tentatively kissed him, once then a second time. His kissed him unsure of what reaction he’d receive, not realizing that Eric would exhale and just welcome it. The tension in his body was released when Dele kissed him for a third time and Eric returned it, his hand clutching Dele’s hip to ground himself, a physical reminder that this was actually happening and not a figment of his overactive imagination. Dele hummed into their kiss, the sensation making Eric’s head spin. This was really happening. He was kissing his best friend, something he didn’t know he wanted or needed until moments before. The hands on Eric’s face moved to cup the back of his neck as the kiss grew more intense, more hungry with Dele biting at his bottom lip. Dele’s fingers were playing with the short hairs on the back of his neck sending shivers down Eric’s spine. 

“D-Del-Dele,” Eric breathed heavily as they pulled apart, not too far, their foreheads resting against each other. “What was that?”

“It’s okay, Eric,” he assured him. “You’ve been oblivious this entire time haven’t you?”

“To what?” He asked, his forehead still pressed against Dele’s but scrunched up in confusion. 

“I’ve wanted to do this since before France,” he laughed. “I was just waiting for you, waiting for the signal to go.”

“I-I don’t know what to say.”

Dele leaned forward and kissed him again, this time softly and quickly. “You don’t have to say anything.”

Eric smiled, his cheeks hot and his chest empty, but an empty feeling that felt good. It felt like he was ready to fill it with everything Dele had to offer him whenever he was ready to do so. He kissed Dele again just because he could and Eric was already loving that feeling, hoping he could do it again and again for many days, weeks, and years to come.


End file.
